Therapy & Life Stressors

Change is Part of Life 

Perhaps if one more person tells you this, you will scream into a pillow. Yes, you have experienced change, who hasn’t? But unlike the people around you who appear to be coping with new changes and transitions, you feel lost, overwhelmed, anxious or stuck. Your world has been turned upside down. Suddenly, it seems like the coping tools you have used before aren’t working or are not available to you. Nurture Therapy gets you!

Odds are, by a certain age, most people have experienced significant changes and transitions in their lives. Whether it be a positive change, such as beginning a new job or having a baby, or a negative change, the loss of a loved one, we can accept that change is a part of life. Engaging in therapy to learn healthy coping mechanisms for life transitions, both positive and negative, can be very beneficial. 

If you or someone you know is experiencing distress around a life transition or major change, help is available. Call or email to find out more.  

Life Transitions and Stressors  

Life transitions are based on many factors and are personal to an individual’s experience. What may seem like a big transition to one person may not feel that way to someone else. Transitions can be both positive or negative, either planned or unexpected, and have a strong impact on our emotions, coping, and overall functioning. Below are a few common life transitions that we have supported people through. 

• Living in a new city

• Career confusion or changes

• Motherhood or new parenting

• Deciding whether to have kids or not

• The coming out process/gender, sexuality, and identity exploration

• Shifting from school to the workforce

• Changes in relationship status

• Grief and loss

• Substance abuse and recovery

• Health Problems

• Disabling accidents or tragedies 

• Marriage 

• Moving 

• Travel

• Social/ Political changes 

• Being in a different phase of life than your friends.

Symptoms Resulting from Change

The criteria for Adjustment Disorder is having emotional or behavioral symptoms following a specific stressor occurring in your life. These behaviors are considered to be greater than what we would normally expect in response to a stressful life event and/or cause significant problems in one’s relationships, work, school, and overall functioning.

COMMON SYMPTOMS:

• Uncertainty

• Isolation

• Loss of sense of self

• Grief

• Confusion

• Hopelessness

• Decrease in motivation

• Depression

• Anxiety 

• Uninterested in things that you used ot enjoy

• Frequent crying

• Worrying or feeling anxious, stressed out

• Trouble sleeping

• Lack of appetite

• Difficulty with focus or concentration

• Feeling overwhelmed 

• Difficulty functioning

• Withdrawal from social supports

• AvoidanceAvoiddance

• Thoughts of self-harm

Whatever change you’re experiencing and how you are responding to it, we are here to support you. Call or email to find out more.  

Adjusting to Positive and Negative Stress 

Uncertainty, isolation, grief, loss of self, pride, hopefulness, growth, feeling capable, empowerment – what do all these things have in common? These are all experiences that accompany change. Over a lifetime, individuals will experience many changes; both positive and negative. Positive changes may include graduating, promotions, marriage, and children. Other life changes, such as moving, entering the workforce, and breakups may cause significant negative stress. 

Positive changes may still be difficult, but can also impact personal growth and success and leave one feeling stronger, more confident, and better equipped to approach life. No matter what change you are experiencing, know you are not alone. There is no one experience of change or one correct way to feel or respond to change. 

Common themes with change & how therapy can help

THEME #1: GRIEF AND LOSS

Grief and loss can accompany both positive and negative changes. Sometimes there is a tangible loss, such as the loss of a loved one or job. Other times, losses are ambiguous losses, such as losses that we cannot hold onto or name always. Positive changes can also bring up feelings of loss and grief. For a new parent, there are many pervasive losses that come with parenting, including the loss of freedom, the loss of control, loss of autonomy, loss of time to yourself, loss of self-identity, and loss of relationship with a partner, family members, or other children. 

THERAPY CAN HELP

• Normalize Grief

• Facilitate mourning

• Re-establish identity

THEME #2: ROLE TRANSITIONS

For many new roles, there is a normal and natural period of adjustment that occurs. Sometimes the expectation vs. reality of a change does not align. Role transitions may occur whenever a major life change is associated with difficulty coping, including employment, relationship status, physical health, socioeconomic status, and living conditions. You may have to adapt to social relationships and develop new coping skills to deal with your new and changing role.

THERAPY CAN HELP 

• Redefine or give up old roles

• Discuss losses—allowing yourself to mourn the old role-expressing sadness, guilt, anger, and fears at the loss

• Acquire new skills

• Develop new attachments and supports, (i.e., join a new moms support group)

• Ensure you are getting practical and emotional support

• Recognize positive aspects of a new role

THEME #3: ROLE DISPUTES

A change or life transition can be associated with unsatisfying interpersonal relationships. A change may highlight or restructure set roles and role expectations. For example, if partners do not usually ascribe to stereotypical gender roles and then have a baby, gendered roles can be filled with conflict, resentment, and disputes.

THERAPY CAN HELP 

• Re-negotiate or give up old roles

• Modify your communication pattern with your partner

• Stop keeping score with your partner

• Re-evaluate your expectations in a relationship

• Safely explore new roles

• Gain willingness to negotiate

• Explore patterns of strength and difficulties in these relationships  

THEME #4: INTERPERSONAL DEFICITS

It is common for an individual to lose their groove after a major life change and experience greater conflicts among loved ones. Sometimes major transitions or changes can bring up feelings of failure or other negative core beliefs about self. You may experience an old pattern of reacting or coping with things that are not effective or helpful. This can impact our functioning and overall mood.

THERAPY CAN HELP

• Learn new coping skills

• Regain confidence in skills

• Increase self-esteem

• Challenge negative thoughts

Coping with Change 

Nurture Therapy is here to help. Our hope is to support you in navigating both the current change, and in gaining tools, strategies, confidence, and insight to navigate changes in the future. We are intentional about pairing evidenced based strategies with your own needs, strengths, values, and goals to create a treatment plan that feels right for you.   

How Therapy Can Help 

Therapy offers a space to process the change. At Nurture, we are here to support you as you navigate all aspects of change— the challenges, distress, and grief that can come from change and the growth, empowerment, and self-confidence that might also result from the change. 

We work with you to create a treatment plan that incorporates evidence-based practices paired with your own needs, strengths, values, and goals.

STRENGTHS-BASED PERSPECTIVE 

Strength-based therapy focuses on your internal strengths and resourcefulness, rather than weaknesses, failures, or shortcomings. Nurture Therapy encourages client involvement to come up with strengths, viewing you as the expert of your own lives. The tenet is that a positive mindset can help build upon coping techniques, improve resilience, build strengths, and change one’s worldview. 

CONFIDENCE BUILDING 

We use many evidence-based treatments to build your confidence and improve your self-esteem. We understand that low confidence plays a significant role in both anxiety and depression. By not believing in your own abilities, you tend not to take risks, or complete tasks half-heartedly. In therapy, you can challenge dysfunctional thinking patterns, alter ineffective patterns that keep you stuck in low confidence cycles, and engage in more positive thoughts about yourself. 

ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY 

ACT therapy encourages you to embrace their thoughts and feelings rather than fight them. Using mindfulness, ACT has us accept feelings while committing to values, which is a much more workable way to live. We apply this to parenting attitudes and values.

When do I need professional help?

If you are not feeling like yourself or your typical coping tools are not cutting it, then therapy might be a good option for you. We understand it can be uncomfortable to start therapy or anything new. However, if you are feeling stuck in your sadness, anxiety, grief, anger, or guilt therapy can help. Ask yourself these questions:

• Have you been consumed with fear, worry, or anxiety about the future or a recent change?

• Are your emotional experiences interfering with your ability to work, take care of yourself or your other children, or engage in basic self-care?

• Are you having frequent and intrusive thoughts?

• Do you have any intent to act on suicidal thoughts or do you plan to harm yourself?

• Are you engaging in any other self-destructive acts?

How can therapy help me?

Therapy provides the space to help you get through your sadness and other intense feelings. As a therapist, we will guide you through this time in a way that feels safe and effective.

• Helping you to understand and embrace a new change in your life

• Regaining control of your emotions

• Preparing for the future or a major life change

• Encouraging communication with loved ones

• Feeling like yourself again

• Promoting hope and confidence