Coronavirus: Collectively Coping During Uncertain Times
These are unprecedented and uncertain times. With uncertainty comes a feeling of losing control. It is often this lack of control that sparks anxiety or panic. Many people may be experiencing anxiety for the first time in their lives. As we continue to navigate these challenging times, we recognize that no one is exempt from what is occurring in the world right now—including therapists.
There have been a few notable times in recent history, where therapists have experienced the same or similar thoughts, feelings, and concerns as their clients. Such times include being a therapist in New York after 9/11; while many clients were grieving the loss of family and friends, their therapists were as well; or following the 2016 Presidential Election, while many clients were processing shock and disbelief with their therapists, many therapists were processing these feelings too. And now, here we are again, in a very similar position as our friends, family, neighbors and even our therapists.
As a therapist, one of the psychological concepts I understand about times of crisis is that panic evokes panic. Consider for a moment your initial thoughts and feelings when you first heard of COVID-19. Now think about how you felt after you spoke to an anxious friend or saw that items were flying off the shelves. How did you feel then?
There’s a psychological component of fear or fear contagion, whereby the collective anxiety causes further panic. This is especially true right now due to the conflicting messages from the CDC and government authorities. When faced with fear, we look for ways to regain control by being overly prepared, stockpiling and panic buying. While snagging the last toilet paper roll may alleviate anxiety in the moment, this relief is only temporary and we will likely continue to feel anxious. A more effective way to address and alleviate anxiety is to let go of control. I like to do this by asking the question: ‘What is the problem right now?’ The problem right now is NOT what the world is going to look like two-weeks from now, two months from now, etc. The problem right now may be, how am I going to get through today? By focusing the problem on the here-and-now, anxiety feels much more manageable.
Here are some things that I am trying to do:
I am continuing to support my staff and our clients via teletherapy
I am acting with kindness by thanking those who are unable to work remotely or stay at home, such as individuals in the medical field, first responders, service workers, shop and store owners, pharmacists, veterinarians (shout out to Dr. Nick), mail carriers, sanitation workers, etc.
I am asking strangers how they are coping. Far too often, when we are scared, we become impatient, anxious and entitled to get our own needs met. I am trying to be aware of others around me and how they may or may not be coping at this time.
I am checking on elderly family members and neighbors and offering to help.
I am being mindful of what I am buying; not stockpiling items unless I need it right away. Remember; do not take items with a WIC symbol. Those families who rely on WIC cannot purchase another brand and will leave a store empty-handed if these items are out of stock. Also, if your child drinks formula, only take what you need. If formula runs out and families cannot feed their babies than that will be a true emergency.
I am trying not to take my personal worries out on my husband (sorry hun!) I am still working on this one.
I am trying to exercise at home and eat well.
I am continuing to support small businesses and local restaurants that will be harmed by social distancing by purchasing classes, products or gift certificates that can be used at a later date or ordering through no-contact delivery services. These businesses still need to pay employees and make rent payments.
I am staying connected with friends and family virtually and by phone.
I am organizing and cleaning out different rooms of my house (my pantry is looking amazing!)
I am trying to keep calm and set a good example as my actions and behaviors may have a direct impact on another’s health.
I am recognizing the privilege that I have as I can avoid crowded subways, work remotely, stock up on necessary items and stay at home. For this, I am grateful. It is times like these, that the vast disparities in wealth and privilege seem so painfully clear.
Here are some self-care practices that you can do. I call these protective strategies and I usually share these with my new moms. These strategies help alleviate some of the stressors and mood concerns that can occur during the postpartum period. However, they are also great strategies to keep stress at bay during this time.
Get Good Sleep
Sleep is highly correlated to our mental health and functioning. When you are not getting good sleep you are at higher risk for depression and anxiety. Sometimes disturbances in sleep patterns can be a symptom of depression or anxiety. It is amazing what we can and cannot cope with when we have not slept so it is important to continue with good sleep habits and routines.
Go to bed at a reasonable hour and at the same time that you would if you were leaving the house to go to work or school. Don’t stay up late just because you can hang out in your pajamas all the next day.
If you are having difficulty falling asleep then practice good sleep hygiene by minimizing the use of screen time at least thirty minutes before bedtime, includes phones, tablets, television and computer screens. Start turning off and dimming lights in your home in the evening. Avoid working out, having a large meal or drinking alcohol in the evenings.
If you are unable to fall or stay asleep due to racing thoughts, consider meditation, mindfulness or body scans before going to bed. Sometimes anxiety causes our mind to race. This commonly happens when our brains have a few minutes of quiet, which is, unfortunately, usually as we are trying to go to sleep. It is normal to be anxious at this time, but if the anxiety is interfering with functioning, such as sleep, it may be time to talk to a mental health professional about how you are feeling.
Focus on Nutrition
Many of us are guilty of emotionally or stress eating. Try not to eat when you are not hungry or out of boredom due to being home. Stick to healthy eating habits and eat during regularly scheduled meals or snacks. Fatty foods and foods with a lot of sugar are more likely to cause anxious feelings. Sticking to a healthy diet will restore your energy and heal your body.
If you are finding yourself without an appetite, try to eat soft and bland foods. Sometimes anxiety can cause food aversions or nausea. It may feel like you have a lump in your throat and the thought of eating is not only unappealing but enough to make you sick. In these cases, try to first eat soft foods such as bananas, yogurt, and eggs. Even if you are not craving anything, it is important to keep your energy up.
Support
Even if you are practicing social distancing, it is important not to socially isolate. Isolation can cause feelings of loneliness and depression. If you are prone to these feelings, it is especially important to find creative ways to connect with friends and family. Try picking up the phone and calling friends and family members that you talk to regularly or that you have not talked to in a while. Check-in on older relatives and friends to see how they are managing. The other night, my friends and I participated in a virtual hangout via FaceTime, which was a great way to laugh and reconnect.
If you have children, consider having a virtual play date with another family. Miss Beth from Big City Readers has been hosting storytime on her Live Instagram feed. Many other kids’ classes and workout studios are offering virtual and streaming options at this time. This can be a great way to find support and connect to others.
Exercise and Move
Whether it is a formal workout, doing lunges across the kitchen or having a dance party in your living room. It is important to move your body. Exercise helps reduce and channel stress. It is good for both our mental and physical health.
Consider walking or running outside. Download workout and fitness apps to do at home. Participate in streaming or video workouts. If you have kids, get them involved in the at-home workout. If you have little kids, chasing them around the house can also count as moving!
Fresh Air
Fresh air is so important. You can still practice social distancing and get outside. Try to make an effort to get out at least once per day. If you live in a colder area—like Chicago—dress appropriately or make your walks short. Getting outside and into the crisp air will be very beneficial for you and your mental health.
Try these strategies and see how your day gets better. At this time, we do not know how long we will be home or what the future holds. So what does this mean for clients and therapists alike? To reassure clients, it does not mean that your therapist will not be available to you. Your therapist will still be able to support you during these uncertain times. For therapists, this means that getting consultation and good support is vital to our own good practice. It is important to keep a positive frame of mind and take care of yourself.
Many therapists are offering teletherapy or phone therapy sessions. You are not alone. If you are struggling, connect with someone and get the help you need. We are all in this together.